From Trial to Triumph.
Part of my story - Chapter 10
Many years ago I wrote (but didn't publish) a 50,000 word autobiographic manuscript, which sounds like a lot but once the words start flowing it really was nothing. How can you wrap up 25 years in 50,000 words anyway? That’s the true reality check. Those words weren’t just my story either, they were insights into how I overcame many of my hardest times, including but not limited to; having a devil worshiper as my biological father, 7 years of sexual abuse from my adoptive father, many more father figures and much more heartbreak in between, abandonment on all sides, severe depression, suicidal tendencies, the eventual suicide of my own mother and only parent, abusive relationships (physical, emotional, mental) on all sides, and much more.
Since those 25 years have passed I have faced many more battles including a variety of serious health issues including heart surgery, brain scares, cancer, and spiritual abuse from a church that I was involved in for 13 years of my life; this being the biggest challenge by far.
So yes a lot has happened but the purpose was never to record history. The purpose was to point toward HOPE - something this world desperately needs. What’s the point of writing your story unless you truly want to leave something behind that may make someone else’s life just a little bit better, and a lot more purposeful - filled with truth and hope that will guarantee your journey be victorious whether here or in eternity.
So writing my story isn’t really the issue. But 50,000 words on my first amateur attempt…?...That’s a big question mark! The reality is most people in this day and age don’t like picking up big thick books especially by someone they’ve never heard of. Autobiographies are reserved mostly for the well-known right? Funny that, some of the most powerful and inspirational testimonies come from those not bathed in the spotlight. True?
The simple truth is that everyone has a story. The only question is how much value do we place on it? Lisa Bevere recently put up a post challenging the likes “My lion brothers & sisters it is time you learn to WRITE your life well! We need the expression of your story to bring HIM glory!” I say Amen to that.
A few years ago my story was included in a book along with many other inspirational survivors in New Zealand. The book is entitled “From Trial to Triumph” written by an amazing man and esteemed author George Bryant (link to the book here). I continue to feel humbled that my story was included alongside such amazing testimonies, but the overwhelming desire to write and speak about my own account has never left me, and continues to grow with each passing day. I think that's called a "Call"!!?
As for my first attempt, lets just call it good solid research. Written by someone determined to dig deep and get to the raw. I’ve decided to cut down and rewrite those initial 50,000 words into short stories based on ‘subject’ as opposed to the traditional start to finish timeline. Like a series – each mini-book will focus on the specific issue and how I personally overcame it. This may help people choose what they want to read according to what they need to read in that moment!
For example cancer, especially facing cancer with faith – a battle I’m currently facing and have already done a lot of ground work on through my blogs HERE. Or the subject no one wants to talk about: Child molestation and how making sense of that escapes us on every level. Unless….you can to some degree, and whats-more find peace within it. Or the ever-huge subject of depression and suicide. Both of which I have been faced with directly and experienced intimately. There are answers in the midst of all this pain and suffering - yes there is. As I've said already "I don't have all the answers, but I have learnt how to empty out the too-hard-basket, get my hands dirty, and sift through the dirt and rubble for those rough but exquisite gemstones. Because they are there - no matter how senseless, traumatic and shattering your life experiences have been"
This is just a few examples of the mini-books I plan to release, and I am excited at the prospect of cutting the proverbial elephant into chunks. To be honest I have often struggled with locating a focus point for sharing my journey and ministering to people – especially lately. Many people choose something to focus on based on a dominant experience or passion and go with that to help other people. I just can’t seem to drill down to one or two and it has left me a wee bit frustrated. Everyone is expecting me to go with cancer or the recent church dilemma but the truth is, there are just too many life experiences to choose from and I am passionate about all of them. So this is my attempt at gathering the big picture into sight and packaging each beautiful chunk into bite sized pieces for all who need a little bit of hope and inspiration.
Prayers and encouragement to do this is welcome at this point. Now that I’ve said it out loud I am accountable to all who read this. If you want to keep up to date and grab those little mini-books when they come out feel free to subscribe to this site (me) and I will send you up to date info :)
I have other books on my heart to, including one I have already started working on entitled “Not desperate for just Any man”(link to extract here), which explores, uncovers, exposes, and ultimately shows the way to meeting and marrying the man your Father God desires for you – as told by someone who personally followed the blueprint for success!! (Not before many failed attempts trying to do things my way - of course). I may include this one with the series mentioned above now that I think about it.
I also have several more books in the incubator - So many spirit-induced words on my heart, and often I feel like I’m never going to have enough time. God willing this is part of my time on earth, alongside being a good wife, raising my family, following prophetic business dreams, ministry callings, staying alive ha!….and bringing glory to Him. Always!
Thanks so much for following these blogs. I appreciate your support more than words can express (which is an interesting dilemma for me as you may be able to tell lol). Love and blessings always.